New York City - Home

NYC

New York has been home for me for nearly a dozen years now. I've seen streets change, I've seen new people come every year. I've seen this city survive Sandy. I've seen its people grow with it. 

I still remember that one night after Sandy. It's the first Monday with the lower half of Manhattan without any power, including my own apartment. Despite no power, water or heat, I didn't leave. I left for work every morning and returned every night. That first night, however, was special. The first night - I walked home with dozens of strangers. No one knew each other, yet we walked home on Second Avenue. Cops would pull over and walk us a few blocks for our own safety. Public busses would stop and ask if anyone needed a ride. It was incredible. 

This weekend, in the longest time that I can remember, I've had a weekend. I did the 4:30am thing on Friday. I played tennis in Williamsburg. I walked the Brooklyn Bridge promenade. I had great food. And for once - did not think about work. The work / life separation doesn't happen for me that often. But when it does. It feels great. 

It also reminded me that New York really is home for me. I've traveled the world. Not necessarily looking for something, but to get something out of it. But, as I spend a few weeks in New York, I realize that this place I call home is home for a reason. I know enough bartenders that will entertain me if I ever need some Bud Lights. I know enough people that stumbling around lower east side, I will run into a familiar face. And I know enough hidden places that make people smile. 

Most importantly - every good thing in my life has started here. That first job. That first dream. That first company. And many many more. This city is home for me. While people have come and gone. And while I'll meet many more visitors as they cross this island, it has never let me down. 

Stay strong, New York. The city, I proudly call home. 

A Surfboard and a House

Surf

I've had a really interesting week. All good things, but extremely exhausting for an immune system that is failing me lately. 

There are certain people that I want to see during the week. Seeing them makes my days better. 

As we are having drinks this afternoon, I overhear the two people next to me talking about life in general. 

Being the rude individual I am, I listened to them as my favorite person in the world left to visit the restroom. 

Their conversation was interesting. However the part that stuck out for me was a straightforward question from one person to another: "What's the biggest thing you've purchased?"

Person 1: "a house"

Person 2: "a surfboard"

As my date returned, I focused on her. She's incredible, so easy choice. 

But, as I've thought more and more about that question today, it is a very deep question. 

And I'll rephrase it this way - would you rather own a house or a surfboard?

Or another way - would you rather be confined to safety or believe in adventure?

Or a final way - would you rather follow tradition or your heart?

Life is about those little moments. The first conversation. The first dream. And the first smile. 

You just need to know if you want to be on a surfboard or in a house. 

On Chasing Adventure

“Let us step into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure.”

— J.K. Rowling

Costa Rica, 2013. Slipping off the cliff without a proper security harness. 

In a little over 60 days, I depart on the most extreme adventure of my life - New Zealand with stops in Dubai, Hong Kong, Thailand and Australia along the way. 

It's an adventure that I've chased for longer than I can ever remember. To travel. To explore. To jump off bridges. To sitting in a boat and getting thrown off of it. To go down the world's fastest rapids with nothing but a camera. 

It is an expensive adventure. One I really shouldn't be splurging on, but here's the thing - who cares? I find that people work their entire lives without spending money on themselves. I'm a very strong supporter on saving money. I've followed that policy since my first paycheck and continue to do that today. But, I'm also a supporter of budgeting. If you can do it without going into debt - do it. 

But, this story isn't about savings. It's about figuring out what drives you to be better. 

I've had this conversation with multiple people over the course of the past few years - if something makes you happy - that's what you should be doing. 

Want to go out and have a beer? Do it. 

Want to hangout with someone? Do it. 

Want to quit your job? Do it. 

Want to fall in love with someone totally wrong for you? Do it. 

Want to jump out of a plane? Do it.

Want to live on the edge? Do it.

Want to quit? Do it. 

Seriously...do all of it if it makes you happy. I'm fortunate enough that my passion is building things with people I care about and where I can add value. 

Other than that, screw it. No amount of dollar signs are going to convince me. Why? Because I'll be unhappy the entire time. 

I chase adventure because it makes me happy. Yes, there are consequences, but who cares?

I choose to live on the edge because it makes me happy. Yes, I've almost fallen off a cliff to my death. But, I don't care. I've fallen from rocky waterfalls and broken my toe. I drove myself to the hospital, where they couldn't do anything. I still enjoyed my time.

Here's the bottom line - chasing adventure - is just like chasing life. If people hold you back, ditch them. This is your life. Live it the way you want it. You owe yourself at least that much.  

Cost-Benefit of Life

“The purpose of morality is to teach you, not to suffer and die, but to enjoy yourself and live.”

— Ayn Rand

This past weekend, as I’m sitting in my hotel room in Hong Kong, I get a ping on Facebook. It’s a private message via Facebook Messenger from someone I’ve known for more than 10 years. This individual and I have never really been friends, but we’ve been acquaintances and went to high-school and university together. 

The message reads as follows:

"Your words are inspiring. I dream of seeing the world one day. Recently I’ve been thinking I need to make a major life change but I don’t have as much courage as you."

To be honest, this message took me by surprise. For those who know me really well know that I am not the most open person in the world. I hold my emotions and feelings close to me. And that comes off as not very social. It was much worse when I was growing up. When I moved to the United States from the Middle East, I was shy. I never really talked to people and kept to myself. On the other hand, the person who sent me this message was the complete opposite - she was a social butterfly.

And the reason her message to me this weekend is surprising is because so many people keep pursuing a life that is well accepted by society but also completely detrimental to personal well being. 

Don’t like your job? Quit. Don’t like your career? Find a new one. Dislike the person you’re with? There are 7 billion others in the world. Don’t like your friends? Find new ones. Don’t feel that your family is supportive enough? Move out. Don’t like the winter? Move to a beach. Want to travel the world? Buy a plane ticket. 

There are always excuses to NOT pursue something (too old, too young, too poor, too many responsibilities, etc.) But your only responsibility is to yourself. 

Here’s my only question to anyone dealing with any of this dilemma - if you lived like this for the rest of your life, would you be happy? If so, don’t change a thing. If you took more than a second to answer that, go find your passion. 

Yes, it’s scary. It’s supposed to be. When is the last time something good happened because you were comfortable and protected in your little shell? 

Life is short. Live it. 

Don't Follow Your Dreams

“Please do make your decisions in life and feel confident that they are right. However, if fate is involved, feel just as confident even if they aren’t.
”

— C. Elizabeth, Absolute Obsession

As part of my job, I see a lot of ideas come through my desk. A few of them, I get excited about and decide to pursue. Many of them are not the right fit. However, the common trend between these ideas are the people - the startup entrepreneurs. They range from 18 to 60. Their eyes are glowing and they are passionate. They want it. Who knows what it is, but it is clearly important. 

Despite most of my writing that focuses on the positive aspects of startup life, this post is not about the good things. It's about the struggle. Despite the glow in entrepreneur's eyes and the burning desire to succeed, what goes on in the background is crazy and insane. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies. 

These are people who have asked for money from their parents, friends and family. Yet, they have nothing to show for it. 

These are people who have closed out their savings accounts and their paycheck is still $0. 

These are people who have gone from living in a nice apartment to under their desk. 

These are people who have gone into irrecoverable debt and sometimes into bankruptcy. 

These are people who have lost family and friends because the time commitment to building this thing - which may or may not succeed - is inhuman. 

These are people who have sacrificed the best  part of their lives to focus on a dream. 

And that's what is so scary about being a founder. Dreams do come true. Only if you want them to. And the reason I say "these people" is because I have been there. And it was terrifying. It still is terrifying. It keeps me up at night. It scares the living crap out of me. 

But you know what? I am fucking happy. Every single day. Every decision I make is mine. Every word I write is calculated. Every person that has survived this shitstorm with me is family. And that to me is success. 

The world will try to mold you into something that aspirational people disagree with. Every day. Every single minute. It starts off with your GPA, then your SAT scores, then your internship and then your first job. And you realize, during this process, you hate it all. It's not what you thought your life would be. And it sure as hell doesn't make you happy. 

So, here's my advise: don't follow your dreams. It's fucking hard. Instead, follow your heart. It already knows what you can't admit.